H-13 Perbanyak Istighfar

Saat-saat mendekati hari H gini banyak macam-macam pikiran yang muncul. I can’t describe it here because it is very personal. I guess when you are preparing your marriage, mixed thought is a very common thing. We just have to handle it correctly. And the solution is perbanyak istighfar. Ingat sama Sang Pencipta. Banyakin berdo’a supaya apa yang direncanakan bisa lancar, berkah, dan penuh ridho. Itu yang sedang gw lakuin sekarang. Kalau pikiran aneh datang, cepet-cepet istighfar. Kalau readers punya cara ampuh lain, tolong share di sini! Thanks..

On my plate

Buanyak banget dah yang harus dipikirin dan diberesin. Dasar tipikal orang yang suka mikir, kondisi kayak gini bikin kepala penuh. Homework, final test, project, and research. Kata senior, yang namanya PhD itu ya melatih mengatur waktu atas seabrek kegiatan. Bener juga! Belum lagi urusan pribadi dan keluarga. Uwalaahh.. Ini buanyak banget dah. Dijalanin aja biar ga kerasa dah. Kalau dipikirin pasti ga habis-habis. Kasih senyum dulu biar semangat! 🙂

How life goes

Alhamdulillaah life is going pretty well. Semoga aja hidup yang dijalani ini berkah dan dirahmati Yang Punya Kuasa. Karena kalau perasaan makhluk doang yang seneng tapi Yang Punya Nyawa sebaliknya kan gawat. 

Even though research is not going that fast, at least there is still progress. Udah sedikit dapat ide dan mau kolaborasi dengan senior. Target 2 minggu bisa ngelarin performance metrics.

Yang paling penting thanks to Gan Agi yang mau berbagi “ilmu”. Terus saling menyemangati akan target masing-masing gan. When we can dream, we can achieve it. Semoga target gw dan lo bisa tercapai secapatnya! Aamiin.

Alhamdulillaah, October brings more happiness walau kantong agak bolong 😉 moga bisa segera terisi kembali! Yeay 😀

Fokus pikirin masa depan, jauhi yang mengganggu. Keep it simple, stay strong & productive, increase the balance!! Haha

Locked Away – R.City feat Adam Levine

[Adam Levine:]
If I got locked away
And we lost it all today…
Tell me honestly…
Would you still love me the same?
If I showed you my flaws
If I couldn’t be strong
Tell me honestly
Would you still love me the same?

[R. City:]
Right about now…
If a judge for life me…
Would you stay by my side?
Or is ya gonna say good-bye?
Can you tell me right now?
If I couldn’t buy you the fancy things in life
Shawty would it be alright
Come and show me that you are down

Now tell me would you really ride for me?
Baby tell me would you die for me?
Would you spend your whole life with me?
Would you be there to always hold me down?
Tell me would you really cry for me? (Would you really cry for me?)
Baby don’t lie to me
If I didn’t have anything…
I wanna know would you stick around?

[Adam Levine:]
If I got locked away
And we lost it all today…
Tell me honestly…
Would you still love me the same?
If I showed you my flaws
If I couldn’t be strong
Tell me honestly
Would you still love me the same?

[R. City:]
Let’s get it diddly-dong-dong-dong dang
All I want is somebody real who don’t need much
A gal I know that I can trust…
To be here when money low
If I did not have nothing else to give but love…
Would that even be enough?
Gal meh need fi know

Now tell me would you really ride for me?
Baby tell me would you die for me?
Would you spend your whole life with me?
Would you be there to always hold me down?
Tell me would you really cry for me? (Would you really cry for me?)
Baby don’t lie to me
If I didn’t have anything…
I wanna know would you stick around?

[Adam Levine:]
If I got locked away
And we lost it all today…
Tell me honestly…
Would you still love me the same?
If I showed you my flaws
If I couldn’t be strong
Tell me honestly
Would you still love me the same?

[R. City:]
Tell me, tell me, would you want me? (Want me!)
Tell me, tell me, would you call me? (Call me!)
If you knew I wasn’t ballin’
Cause I need a gal who’s always by my side…
Tell me, tell me, do you need me? (Need me)
Tell me, tell me, do you love me yea?
Or is ya just tryna play me?
Cause I need a gal to hold me down for life…

[Adam Levine:]
If I got locked away
And we lost it all today…
Tell me honestly…
Would you still love me the same?
If I showed you my flaws
If I couldn’t be strong
Tell me honestly
Would you still love me the same?

If I got locked away
And we lost it all today…
Tell me honestly…
Would you still love me the same?
If I showed you my flaws
If I couldn’t be strong
Tell me honestly…
Would you still love me the same?

Would you still love me the same?

Hope

Sehabis sahur tiba-tiba gw mengharapkan sesuatu yang jarang gw pikirkan. Akhirnya gw putuskan nge-whatsapp #code haha this is not so me. Put aside the pride. When there is a hope for something be happened, there should be a prepared space for dissapoinment. 

Uneasy Choice

People say it is hard to choose between two conditions but it is even harder if these two choices are good. Right now, I am facing a condition where I have already decided my choice but still wavering to another one. Yeah. I know it is bad. I am such an unfaithful person, but is it wrong to feel greedy at this time? Have you ever in this situation? To tell you more about this: One is pursuing my PhD degree. Another is to keep working my job now.

Taking a PhD is not an easy job. And it becomes my main reason. It requires hard working, much effort, time, money, and anything of my life *exaggerating* I have read on many articles about PhD life. It is such a nightmare. Not all people can endure the difficulties but not a few people also can pass the hardness. On the other hand, keeping my job right now is a way to increase professionalism. One of big companies in Korea is interested in one of my company works which is one-year project I did last year. It will be big!, my manager told me. Our work finally will result in huge money. However, a wavering thing is not only about money, but also about expertise. Who is the most “ahli” in this project theme? Me. It is ME. If I continue my work, I will be more expert in this field. My expertise will be improved. And how if leave this company? There will be nobody understand it as good as me.

After thinking it many times, I decide taking my PhD. It is already too late taking it back. Registering to university, issuing student ID number,  preparing for orientation, purchasing round-trip ticket for visiting home country before study, and so on, there are just too much things I need to cancel if I keep my job now. Or, it is not too late to put all the things to the right place like just keep my job, postpone my trip to next semester, finding another scholarship next year? One thing to be sure is any choice resulting consequences. Whatever I choose, I can’t take it back, I can’t undo it. Whatever I choose, go straight with it without looking back.